My experience speaking at the TEDx Arlington Heights Conference!

My behind-the-scenes experience of applying for, preparing for and giving a talk at the TEDx Arlington Heights Conference!

I had the fabulous experience to speak on stage on 10.7.23 at the TEDx Arlington Heights Conference!

Here’s my report of what it was like to get from application to on stage for the TEDx Arlington Heights conference! Start to finish was about 7 months of work. I wish I had kept a tally of the number of hours that I spent on it all - it was a LOT of hours!

Speaking at the TEDx Arlington Heights conference

Nudity Doesn’t Have to Be Naughty - TEDx Arlington Heights 10.8.23

Application to speak 3/28/23

Before I got involved with this conference, I didn’t know that much about TED or TEDx talks. I’d listened to lots of TED talks on Youtube and on the TED Radio Hour podcast. But not in my wildest dreams did I think that I could ever be TEDx speaker. It just wasn’t on my radar! In my mind, TED talks were for super fancy and super famous people - and honestly, that is not me!

Out of the blue, I received a direct message on Facebook from the founder of TEDx Arlington Heights team. The message said something like, '“We’d love to have you apply to speak on the TEDx stage, please fill out the online application.”

The message was entirely unexpected. I didn’t have any idea that a TEDx conference was happening near me.

The online application to speak was fairly short. All I had to do was list my credentials and make a 2 minute demo video about a topic I was interested in speaking on. I wrote a script about feminism and the patriarchy. I sent it to my sisters who helped me edit it. Then I set up my phone on a tripod and made the demo video. I recorded two takes and picked the better one. I didn’t sweat it too much. I was pretty sure I wouldn’t be selected, so I didn’t agonize over the application. I hit submit on the TEDx Arlington Heights application thinking, “My application is not that strong. I’ll throw my hat in the ring, but I doubt I’ll get it.”

Acceptance 5/24/23

A few weeks later, I received a very exciting email that I was officially accepted to speak at the TEDx Arlington Heights Conference. I was genuinely surprised that I was selected.

Acceptance email to be a speaker at the TEDx Arlington Heights Conference

Even though I had received an acceptance email, I was told to keep the information secret. I was instructed that the talk title and content was to remain a surprise until the day of the conference. Of course, I shared the news that I had been accepted to speak with my husband. I also shared the news with my employees so that they would understand why I had blocked off time for this project. But everyone I told was sworn to secrecy!

Writing my TEDx Arlington Heights talk

I was excited to be accepted to speak at the TEDx Arlington Heights conference, but now I had to write the talk! I was a bit daunted. I don’t consider myself a writer. I don’t think I’ve written anything much longer than an email since I was in college more than 20 years ago.

My initial topic about feminism and the patriarchy had not been accepted by the TEDx Arlington Heights curation team. Instead, my new topic was about the positive power of nudity.

I got to work just brainstorming and writing down phrases that interested me and statements that I really believed in. I wanted to feel like the talk was authentic to my experience and my voice.

I watched dozens of TED talks to get an idea of what the talk should sound like. Some of my favorites are Brene Brown, Monica Lewinsky, Esther Perel and Mary Roach.

I also read a book about TED talks.

TED Talk book by Chris Anderson

After many hours of writing and several drafts, I sent my first draft over to the TEDx Arlington Heights team. I thought that all of the hard work was done! Turns out, I was just getting started.

The first draft I wrote got sent back with about 50% of it marked for deletion. I had a LOT of ideas. But given the short time slot of the TEDx talk (15 minutes maximum), I really needed to focus my thoughts.

I got to work writing and rewriting. Over the next few weeks, I sent in 8 versions of my talk back and forth to my TEDx coach. Each time I received valuable feedback on what I needed to remove, change or add.

There were many paragraphs, stories and jokes that I really liked that eventually got cut from the talk. I got very familiar with the need to “kill my darlings.”

Learning what “kill your darlings” means

Creating my slides

As a photographer, I naturally wanted to share lots and lots of images along with my talk. I originally had the idea to include LOTS of slides. I noticed that in a lot of the TED talks I watched that the speakers used dozens of slides to illustrate their points. I wanted to show boudoir photos! But the TEDx Arlington Heights conference limited me to just 3 slides. I also could not use any photos that I didn’t have direct usage authority for (even creative commons type of photos was tricky) and I couldn’t show any nudity - which was a bummer since my topic is nudity ;) Each of my slides had to be officially approved.

I ended up going through several revisions on the slides. For example, I wanted to show a slide with Tazima at King Spa in Niles, but I wasn’t allowed to show the King Spa logo. I also wanted to show photos to go along with my Adam & Eve, Michelangelo and bathing machine anecdotes, but there were copyright issues. Here are slide images that I ended up NOT using in my talk:

Slide that I couldn’t use in my TEDx talk because the King Spa logo is visible

Michelangelo Sistine Chapel image from Wikipedia that I couldn’t use in my TEDx slides

Adam and Eve image from Wikipedia that was rejected for use in my TEDx talk

Here are the 3 slides that I ended up showing in my talk at the TEDx Arlington Heights conference:

Meeting with the coach on Zoom

Each speaker for the TEDx Arlington Heights conference was assigned a coach to work with from start to finish. Throughout May, June, July, August and September, I met with my coach regularly times over Zoom. Each time we met, I felt more confident about creating a talk that I would be really proud of. My coach was very helpful, gave a lot of good feedback and challenged me to grow.

One time, we showed up on Zoom wearing matching sweaters ;)

Meeting with my TEDx Arlington Heights coach on Zoom

Announcement 7/19/23

In mid-July, TEDx Arlington Heights announced the speaker line-up on their social media accounts. Even though I had been working on my talk for months, it had been a secret.

TEDx Arlington Heights speaker announcement

When I saw that I would be sharing a stage with an Olympic medalist, PhDs and other super qualified people, I started to have some imposter syndrome creep in. Why was I selected to do this? I was nervous to post on my social media accounts that I would be speaking at the TEDx Arlington Heights conference, but people in my circle were very supportive and encouraging.

Facebook comments to my announcement that I would be speaking at the TEDx Arlington Heights Conference

Memorizing my talk

I had known for months that I needed to have my talk memorized before the first dress rehearsal in August. But I put off actually working on the memorization because I was still finalizing the script and getting feedback from my coach.

Finally, two weeks before the first in-person dress rehearsal, I started to get serious about memorizing my script. Turns out that memorizing a 15 minute speech isn’t easy! At first, I really started thinking that it would be impossible for me to do it. It just seemed like took big of a task to memorize this long of a speech. I seriously considered calling my coach and telling her I was quitting. Memorizing is hard!

I made note cards with the speech. I recorded myself saying the speech and listened to it in the car while I drove. I read the speech over and over again while I was on the StairMaster at the gym. I asked everyone I knew to let me practice for them. I forced my kids to quiz me on my lines. I spent many, many hours working on the memorization.

Working on memorizing my script while at the gym

Shopping for an outfit

The first time I met with my coach on Zoom, I asked her: “What should I wear when I’m on stage?” She responded: “Let’s focus on your writing right now, Liz, not your outfit.”

Ok, ok, she had a point. I hadn’t even written my talk yet, but I was already worried about what I was going to wear on stage!

But I knew that I needed to start thinking about my outfit. Because I’m tall, I often have a hard time finding clothes that fit me well. I knew that I wanted to start shopping early.

I watched a lot of TED talks specifically to see what the women were wearing on stage. A lot of them wore skirts or dresses. Others wore dress pants.

I decided that the most important thing for me was to portray professionalism and confidence on stage. I wasn’t interested in looking “sexy” even though my topic was nudity. I ultimately decided that I would probably feel most comfortable in a blazer or a “power suit.” But I didn’t own anything like that.

I went shopping and tried on a zillion things. My first idea was to wear a skin-colored or light pink suit as a subtle nod to the nudity topic of my talk. I loved the idea of wearing something nude while talking about nudity. I thought it was a cute joke. But I don’t think I looked very good in any of the suits I tried on.

Shopping for a nude suit

My coach thought that the neutral color would wash me out on stage. So my next idea was to try a hot pink look that would convey the idea of “Girl Boss.” I ordered 6 hot pink blazers off of the internet and hoped that I would love one of them.

Ordering lots of pink blazers on the internet

For the day of the TEDx Arlington Heights conference, I ended up choosing to wear a hot pink blazer from Express, a black v-neck blouse, black pants and nude heels.

My TEDx Arlington Heights outfit

First Dress Rehearsal 8/26/23

I walked into the first dress rehearsal still undecided about what to wear, but feeling fairly confident about my memorization. It was fun to meet the TEDx Arlington Heights coach and team in person. Up until this point, everything had been over Zoom. I gave my talk to the team and got feedback. The main feedback that I got was that I speak too quickly. No huge surprise there! I talk to fast in my regular life too - ha! I recorded the dress rehearsal and when I watched it back afterward and it was true - I spoke very quickly. But overall the team was very supportive and I left feeling ready to really solidify the talk over the next few weeks.

TEDx Arlington Heights Dress Rehearsal #1

Meeting my coach in person for the first time

Second Dress Rehearsal 10/6/23

The day before the TEDx Arlington Heghts conference, we had a full dress rehearsal. This was my first time seeing the venue and meeting the other speakers and volunteers.

Right when I showed up at the venue (Rolling Green Country Club in Arlington Heights), I was excited to see the iconic red dot!

TEDx Arlington Heightsdress rehearsal

I felt powerful standing on the dot and knowing that I would be on stage soon, sharing my “big idea.”

Standing on the iconic red dot

The venue was being set up for the conference and energy was electric! There were fire themed decorations and balloons. Every seat had a red box on it with activities inside. There was tons of AV and video equipment everywhere.

Light a Fire decor

The TEDx Arlington Heights conference room

Light a Fire decor

TEDx Arlington Heights dress rehearsal at Rolling Green Country Club, Arlington Heights

When it was my turn to go on stage, I got wired up with an over the ear mic on with the help of the AV team - a first for me! I think I delivered my dress rehearsal speech pretty well! I had a few flubs on pronunciation, but was grateful that I didn’t forget any of my lines. I was really, really nervous. There wasn’t anyone in the room, but I could tell that my voice sounded shaky. But I got through it!

Right after I got off the stage, they took off my mic and told me to go home. I wasn’t allowed to listen to any of the other speakers practice at the dress rehearsal. Probably for the best as that may have made me super nervous!

The TEDx Arlington Heights conference 10/7/23

The day of the conference, I woke up super early to have my hair and makeup done by the fabulous Rosie Hunter. She gave me a soft glam stage makeup look (including false lashes) and helped me feel really confident going into the day! I intended to take some photos while I was getting my hair and makeup done, but totally forgot. I was really nervous!!

I drove from Rosie’s over to the venue and was escorted to a green room where all of the speakers were hanging out. The conference had organized gift baskets for us and made sure we had water and everything we needed.

Nametag and gift basket

The TEDx Arlington Heights conference was put on all with volunteer labor. They were a fabulous group of people.

TEDx Arlington Heights volunteers

At one point, one of the TEDx Arlington Heights volunteers, Mr, Patel said to me, “You look nervous, let’s walk around a bit.” Bless that man. I was SO nervous. It was a beautiful fall day and he walked me around the golf course for a bit to get some sunshine and fresh air.

Mr. Patel, a volunteer who helped to calm my nerves

As the conference guests arrived, there were a couple of interactive stations set up, first a wall where you could write something that “sparks your fire.”

What sparks your fire?

The second was a place where you could write something that you wanted to “burn down.”

What do you want to burn down?

Guests arriving at the TEDx Arlington Heights conference

I was scheduled to speak first. I didn’t get to choose that placement, but it ended up working well for me because it meant I had less time to sit around backstage being nervous.

The conference was kicked off by a fabulous MC named Katie Possley.

TEDx Arlington Heights conference introduced by Katie Possley

Then suddenly it was time for me to be on stage! All of the months of preparation and I just needed to go up and deliver my 13 minute talk! For some reason, when I walked out onto that stage, all of my nerves melted away and I felt really calm. It felt very natural for me to deliver the talk to an actual audience (as opposed to the open rooms I had spoken in for the dress rehearsals).

Walking onto the TEDx Arlington Heights stage

I delivered my talk “Naked Doesn’t Have to be Naughty” and talked about finding courage and freedom through purposeful naked activities, including a boudoir photoshoot! I was really happy with how my talk went. I think I delivered my message and the audience responded positively.

Here are some images of me on stage speaking:

I walked off the stage and breathed a huge sigh of relief. I did it! Many months of work were all worth it!

After my talk, I got to be an audience member for the rest of the conference, which was fabulous. There were 7 other speakers and goal-setting activities, followed by a meet-and-greet and lunch.

TEDx Arlington Heights speakers

Being a speaker at the TEDx Arlington Heights conference challenged and stretched me. I had never done something like this before! I feel grateful for the remarkable opportunity and consider this a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity that I will never forget.

Check out my talk here:

I’d love to hear what you think! Leave a comment on the YouTube video to let me know what you think about my TEDx Arlington Heights talk: Nudity Doesn’t Have to Be Naughty.

Liz HansenComment